Head injury

My 3 year old daughter was diagnosed with ITP last year with a count of 13,000. She now has a count of 18,000 (no treatment). Last week she hit her head on a coffee table (not a bad hit at all) but the whole of her forehead swelled up (10cm across) we had to stay in hospital overnight and she had a platelet transfussion. Now the poor thing has two black eyes, a bruised and still swollen forehead and nose and further bruising all around her nose. Everywhere I go everyone looks at her and I'm getting people give me terrible looks like they think I've done it to her. Her pre school thought we were hitting her before she was diagnosed and now strangers are thinking that - it's driving me mad, I almost feel like I can't go out anywhere at the moment. I feel so sorry for her as she is realising that everyone is looking at her. I'm now really worried about her hitting her head again as this was such a small hit.

I'm so sorry to hear she was bruised up so badly. It sounds like there was no inter-cranial bleeding so that is GREAT news.
Would a soft helmet help ease your worries?
As for the unwanted attention, unfortunatly as it is on her face it's hard to hide, does she have a medical id bracelet, sometimes just the sight of that can help to address curious looks. My thoughts are with you as you go through this leg of this crazy roller coaster we all are on with our kiddo's.
THinking lots of platelets for your little one.
Krissy

Try not to let it bother you. When my daughter was 2 (does not have ITP), she walked into a wall while holding a View Master up to her eyes. She had two black eyes for a week. We got the stares too.

Things happen when they are little and there isn't much you can do about it. People shouldn't be so judgmental. If they are, it's their problem.

I'm glad she's okay!

My son dx at 2. The day I told his child care centre his dx they had a file out ready for the child welfare. They were relieved when told about itp as they knew i would not do anything to harm my child.
As for going out in public where people don't know you there was many a time were I felt like hanging a sign on my son saying my mum does not beat me I have itp.
It took a while for me to get past the stares the whispers.
I now hold me head high when out with my son bruises and all because I know how much courage and strength my son has. And I am proud of him. I no longer worry about what strangers think.

oh my, I'm glad she is ok. Unfortunatly there isn't anything you can do about rude people. They are everywhere! But you have to stay strong for her. It's hard for you to handle the looks, it's even harder for her. As you reassure her, listen to your own words and take them to heart. In the long run, it's gonna be alright.

I completely understand the issues of going out with your "bruised body" child. It is never easy. Our doctor told us a long time ago that there are actually families who have used ITP as an excuse to hide abuse. The biggest advice I can give is to just ignore it. I know it is hard, but if someone has an issue or wants to be rude, that is a them issue, and their problem. You have enough to deal with in terms of your child's health without worrying about what other people think.

Hang in there. I am glad to hear that your daughter is ok. As parents of young kids with ITP, I am anticipating this is just the beginning of our journey. I have an active 16 month old with a huge bruise on his cheek. Baby vs nightstand. I try to take comfort in knowing that my son is happy and very mobile despite it all. If anyone takes issue, it's on their minds - not mine. Be strong.

My parents used to get the same looks from people when i was younger and once when she was sitting having coffee at a cafe with her friend and me and my sister, the police walked past and even came over and chatted to mum to see what was going on.

It is very hard and even now i still hate going out with bruises all over my body, it either looks like someone is abusing me or i am just a clummsy ditz who keeps banging into things, but try not to let it bother you too much. You know your not doing anything wrong, so their opinions and thoughts shouldn't matter.

Thank you everyone. You've made me feel a lot better about everything.

May I ask a question about this, respectfully? I can see how difficult and uncomfortable it must be when your child is treated lovingly but has bruises from illness.

On the other hand - so many children are being mistreated and bruises may not be innocent. How can a bystander intervene as sometimes they should with consideration to the (my guess) minority of situations where there is a sound medical reason and a loving gentle parent?

Would it not be better to err on the side of protecting a child?

I don't know that there is an answer - but I wondered about your thoughts and found this discussion interesting and thought provoking.
Erica

You do have a very good point Eklein and I don't know the answer.

I think my problem is that I am too sensitive to this subject. I was abused thoughout my childhood by my mum it is absolutely the last thing I would do to my kids, they are the most important thing to me, but we found out about our daughters ITP because her preschool thought we were hitting her. I know preschools have to pick up on things like this, but they have dealt with it very badly, it's been really upsetting and it just makes it even worse when I know complete strangers are thinking that I have hit my daughter.

You have made me realise though that I do need try to relax more about this and try not to let it worry me.

That is a tough call for sure and of course I'd want to err on the side of the child. Generally though, you can get an idea of who is an abusive parent by their actions in public. I've seen parents pick their kids up by one arm, the kid swinging in mid air, while the parent whacks away at the kids rear end. You can usually tell by how the parent interacts with the child, how the child is dressed, if they are clean, etc. It's not an exact science, but I think most people can get an idea and sum up the situation by observing.

Those are my thoughts.